A Subject Of Hope
by ExtinctionOfReality
Summary: ShuuKira/KazeshiniKira Summary: It was a peaceful day like any other in Seireitei and Kira was on his way to visit his friend. Little did he know, a shadow was lurking near, ready to ruin his existence and turn it completely upside down...


**Summary:** It was a peaceful day like any other in Seireitei and Kira was on his way to visit his friend. Little did he know, a shadow was lurking near, ready to ruin his existence and turn it completely upside down...

**Pairing:** ShuuKira/KazeshiniKira

**Rating:** NC-16

**Warnings:** mentions of rape, abstractness/weirdness, gory-ness, messy story, one-sided-ness

**Author's notes:** This was done as a gift for _**KicktoKill**_-dearest for Christmas.

I am not really a Haiku-writing-expert, I just looked up a bit of info and wrote something to fit this story. There is nothing much going on here (despite the length, omg), but I still hope it's not so bad...

**Disclaimer: **Don't own Bleach.

_**A Subject Of Hope**_

It was a quiet day like any other in Seireitei and Izuru Kira made his was down the street with some papers. The sun was high up in the sky and the air smelled of summer.

On such a rare occasion, Kira actually wore a smile as he strolled down. Today, he finished work earlier than ever and he was free to do what he liked. So, he started from his favorite activity - writing another Haiku. He didn't want to see it published, but he would most likely like for one of his great friends to check it out.

And by a great friend, he meant his senpai - Shuuhei Hisagi. Usually, Izuru wouldn't show his work to anyone, but he couldn't help it this time. As soon as he wrote the Haiku, he was so proud of it he had to share. And before this flitting feeling passed - he rushed to his companion.

Hisagi-san was running the paper, after all. Even though he couldn't write well himself, he had a good neck on these things and a great understanding of any sort of 'art', as his new Taichou would put it.

Actually, Kira would have revealed to Outoribashi-san he wrote Haiku in his free time, but the man would eat him alive for it, so he decided not to do it himself. If his Taichou found out from someone else - he was fine with it, but doing it himself was a definite no.

And finally, he made it to the 9th Division barracks, because this was where Hisagi-san resided still. The man could get a proper place, as all of them Fukutaichous, but he refused to. Kira never asked, but he knew a reason for that - Hisagi-san was not a spoiled brat and he led a very modest life, because he was from Rukongai. Izuru had little understanding of how that was like, but Hisagi-san wasn't the only friend he had who went through hell in his childhood. As a matter of fact, the great majority of his companions were all from Rukongai. He wasn't sure how that happened, but... Izuru was glad. They were all so kind to him, despite his upbringings. And tolerant to his seemingly-noble-attitude that he still had left from when he was little. Surely, it changed over time and faded into a newer, and he hoped, better form of his personality, but he still had it in him. Deep down, he still thought of himself as a brat who had it all and didn't deserve anything.

But he was used to self-loathing anyway. Nothing concerning it was new to him, so any thoughts he had right now were so normal he hardly gave them a second thought.

And he never actually opened up to anyone about it. Everyone just thought he was shy, but... That wasn't it. He just didn't want to open his mouth, afraid something foul would leave it.

And that was how he lived everyday.

Finally making his way up a few stair flights, Izuru stopped at his friend's room. Strangely, and he didn't fail to notice despite him being lost in thoughts - the barracks were quiet. And he hasn't seen a single soul. Was the 9th Division still busy? Maybe everyone was out training? And he hoped to talk to Hisagi-san so much. He wanted to share a Haiku with him...

Sighing, Kira almost gave up without even knocking, but then, he suddenly heard a loud scream coming from inside the 9th Division Fukutaichou's room.

His entire body stiffened and went numb in an instant, heart beating so fast he thought he was going to lose consciousness.

What was happening? Was everything okay? Was Hisagi-san alright..?

What...what was he supposed to do now..?

Gathering enough courage after a few minutes of standing there and trying to remember what breathing was, the 3rd Division Fukutaichou took a deep breath and finally knocked on the door...slowly, as if it was going to swallow him any second now.

"Hisagi...san..?" there was no reply, but he heard rustling and something fall over, making a loud sound...a guitar? Hisagi-san's pride and joy?!

Eyes wide, Kira lost feelings of fear in an instant and tried the handle. The door clicked open without an effort. Running into the dark room, he all but screamed, concerned, "Hisagi-san! Is everything al...right..?" he had to stutter the last part. He had to. There was no other thing he could possibly do...

No other thing...at all...

And his knees almost gave out.

There, he saw a complete mess of a room, so unlike his senpai. The brunet's guitar was discarded useless on the floor among many other things.

And...Hisagi-san himself was standing in the middle of the chaos, fingers clenching at his hair, back to Kira as he shook violently, letting out uncharacteristic and pain-filled whimpers. His arms were a bloody mess, many cuts and hideous bites adorning them, the shihakushou was ripped in so many places too, blood seeping through countless wounds. All battle marks against a hideous foe... A very dangerous one Kira couldn't yet comprehend...

"Hisagi...san..?" he asked again, helplessly. He wanted to know if his friend was alright, at all. He wanted to help the best he could, but at the same time, a sight like this would make even the strongest man crawl.

And Izuru wasn't weak... But he wasn't strong enough for this...

And he was right not to be. Because slowly, Shuuhei turned to him...so slowly, he felt he was watching everything in slow-motion. Fear was seeping through his every vein again.

He was trapped...he got himself in a huge mess. He could feel it with his gut. And this just had to happen on one of the few days when he felt like...he was glad to be alive.

Horror...this was horror...something similar to one of those things he has seen in the Human world theaters. Only this was much worse. It was happening in real life, at this very second and with him.

And he had no way of getting out.

All he could do was stand even though his mind told him to run...runaway as fast as you could. This room... It was a contrast to the sunny outside - world full of wonder and peace that this was not.

But nothing would be the same again after this. He knew that.

And he was...right...

As soon as Hisagi-san turned around, Kira's eyes widened into slits, his face overwritten with the exact same despair he brought upon his enemies in battle.

Only this time, he was the one feeling and experiencing it.

The tattooed man's eyes were...black...completely and utterly black. There was nothing inside, but at the same time, there was no sign of blood, which meant they weren't clawed out although it looked like they were.

It was...scary... Kira wanted out of this nightmare.

"Ki...ra..." Shuuhei was still shaking all over as he faced Izuru, his breathing heavy and it felt as if he was going to break any second, "Get...a...way...from...here..." he managed out between sickening breaths and tries to control his body, grabbing one of his arms, digging nails into it, deeply into flesh, but not even reacting from that either, "Hur...ry..." he pleaded with the blond...and that's what the expression on his face showed, despite there being no eyes.

But it was too late. Because as soon as he warned Izuru, his black and empty eyes widened and he let out a shriek, falling back against the wall, hitting hard enough for it to crack.

Izuru stood still, overtaken with panic and inability to understand what was going on, what he was supposed to do. He should have taken Hisagi-san's warning and ran as fast as he could...but he didn't.

And he was going to pay for it tenfold.

A wide, uncharacteristic smirk appeared on Shuuhei's face as he slowly picked himself up from the floor, "Finally, at long last, the fucking weakling lost," Shuuhei's voice had a deeper, filled with malice and rage sound to it. He smashed the wall with his fist, "Fuck off, moron. Crawl into the back of my head where you belong."

The sight was terrorizing Kira inside out. He had no clue what was going on. He knew Hisagi-san was in a constant battle with his Zanpakutou spirit, that's what he told him and their group of friend before, but this...this was...

Kira couldn't even begin to comprehend it was this serious.

Finally, he took a step back to run, only for the man in Hsagi-san's body, because he knew for a fact that was not senpai, turn to look at him in seconds, like a hawk at its prey.

And even though there were no eyeballs, this time, Kira felt every single notion of that fierce look.

No...

"Oh? What is this? A little lamb for me to play with?" the man licked at his canines and at that same moment, Kira turned on his heels on instinct and ran. He ran as fast as he could down the stairs for his dear life. He hasn't run this much in his entire life, he was sure of it.

But of course, it was no use. And he knew it since the start. Something pierced his leg right through just as he made it to the front door of the barracks, crying out painfully, the piece of paper with his Haiku swaying in the air and dropping on the floor beside the hideous man's feet, who tilted his head to the side in amusement at Izuru's struggles, before eying the paper.

"Hn? What is this now?" picking it up, he glanced at the paper for nearly a second, before ripping it up completely, "Damn, can't read," and he stepped over to Kira, whose entire body shook in pain, hisses and whimpers coming out of his mouth as he held unto his pierced leg.

"Music to my ears, filthy little boy," the man grabbed his Kusarigama weapon that he threw, pulling it out of Kira's leg forcefully, blood spraying, making the blond cry out loudly while he licked at the blood, laughing loudest and most amused, "I haven't had this much fun since forever! This is amazing!" every part of his body showed he was thrilled at what was happening, "Hello, real world! No more fucking depths of that fucked soul with nothing but pain and anguish to hold me down with! Enjoy your own damn grievous mind, fuckhead!"

While the man was talking, Kira used the time to heal his leg at least a bit, enough to get away, only for one of his hands to be stomped on with force, "Oh no you don't, blondie. The fun has only just begun," and all Kira was hit in the gut hardest, another cry escaping him.

Before he lost conscious, he felt his hair getting yanked and being dragged somewhere...and he knew...

He could no longer do anything.

* * *

Kira didn't know how long he was out, but the reality was cruel enough to punch him in the face, literally, as he woke up. He couldn't even dream for a second in hopes what he previously saw was just a dream, no...

He woke up chained to the wall with Hisagi-san's Zanpakutou's Shikai form's chains he has seen quite a couple of times...but he certainly never imagined they would be used on him someday.

"Finally awake. I was getting really bored," the man wearing Hisagi-san's mask snarled right at his face, before spreading his hands at his sides, grinning hideously, "We are going to have so much fun!"

Forget the pierced leg, his body hurt all over, the short bang of hair hardly hiding his eye. Gods, what did he get himself into and...

"Why...Hisagi...sa-" he was slapped hard across the face, without being able to finish.

"Kazeshini, bitch. Don't you dare call me using that weakling's name!" the Zanpakutou spirit screamed, swaying one Kusarigama in his hand, "You are probably wondering why I am doing this, ne, little blondie?" he leaned over to Kira's face, "Well, that's easy..." he caresses the tender skin using his weapon, smirking, "This is fun and I have nothing better to do~"

Kira didn't say anything. He was thinking of a way out, but these chains...they were too strong and he felt...drained. Completely out of it. He knew he had to get out...because this was going to get bad, but...he couldn't.

So he just...well, you can't say he accepted his fate with open arms, but... Blood loss was draining him. And he couldn't do anything.

"Meh...you are so dull and boring, I regret waiting for your awakening. No idea what the twat sees in you really," Kazeshini snarled and swung his weapon to cut the blond's skin, receiving a loud cry.

In his pain-ridden state, Kira could no longer think as he took in heavy breaths, receiving more and more of Kazeshini's abuse until his shihakushou was practically ripped to shreds, blood seeping out more, slowly making a pool on the floor.

If he didn't pass out from blood loss, it would be an achievement.

Kazeshini kept laughing at him, before suddenly stopping, a frown on his face, "This is really too dull. So even if I try killing you, you will continue making the same sounds, eh..."

Kira raised his head a bit, a pitying look on his face, "Sad...creature..." he choked out, receiving an instant punch in the gut, blood spilling out of his mouth and unto Hisagi-san's shihakushou as he took in hungry breaths, shaking a bit. Damn, he was so tired already...

"You are really a fool, you know..? A fucking prey should sit quietly and cower before its predator, not go around sprouting shit when it's barely alive," Kazeshini paused, running a hand down Kira's body, "So this is what he desired for so long, eh... Lucky you came into the room at the right time. So I can break what the shitty idiot so long since desired," Kazeshini smirked, his eyes softening as he leaned over and licked at Kira's ear, his hands running lower making Kira thrash and try to pull away from him with what little strength he had left.

"No...stop..." the blond pleaded, but of course the Shadow wouldn't and continued on with his ministrations.

"Oh stop whining you little shit. You will love it," the chains disappeared from Kira's body only to reappear again as he fell down on the floor.

Why...why was this happening to him..? He was feeling his senpai's touches, but...it was not senpai. It was not his friend, he had to remind himself of that over and over as the other had his way with him. He tried to get away, but the chains were wrapped tightly around him, digging into his flesh...and there was no way out of it in the end.

He could no longer hear anything as he was abused away by the hideous beast trapped inside Hisagi-san's flesh. His body was numb and after some minutes, he could no longer feel any pain. He smelled blood...everywhere around him...not hearing what the monster was saying, only the nauseous laughs loud and clear.

Loud and...clear.

When Kazeshini was finished, he was on the verge of losing consciousness. Towards the end, the madman apparently thought it would be amusing if he played around with him a bit more. So he was abused and raped again and again. He lost his consciousness a couple of times in-between, but he didn't pass out completely. He was always slapped awake, never allowed the luxury of rest...even death felt like a better way out at the time.

He didn't know how much time passed, but it was all over at some point.

As he lay there in the pool of his own blood, mind blank, barely conscious, body used to pain already, he flinched when he felt a pair of hands cup his cheeks, tenderly, slowly, and a kind whisper, "Kira..?"

Izuru blinked, turning his head, vision slightly blurred, but he made out a face of his senpai...and...what was it...tears?

_Please don't cry, Hisagi-san...please, don't blame yourself more than you already have._

_Please, don't hate yourself..._

_You shouldn't…_

_For you did nothing wrong…_

Kira smiled a bit, but tenderly, at least, he hoped that was what his face showed as he raised a hand that almost dropped for he no longer had strength to hold it upright, Shuuhei catching it in time though, kissing it, holding to his wet cheek, tears unstoppable.

"It's o...kay..." Kira choked out, heavy coughing following, awakening Shuuhei as he jumped to his feet, gathering Kira in his arms tenderly, holding to himself, whispering, "It's alright, Kira...it'll be okay... I will fix you up...even if it...kills...me..." and he muttered on and on the same thing none-stop.

Hisagi couldn't stop. He snapped.

Snapped.

Izuru breathed hard...but he knew everything was going to be alright...so he leaned into Hisagi-san's chest, closing his eyes.

There was some movement and sounds and words said, but everything was blurry and hazy, so Izuru couldn't pinpoint what it was.

When Kira opened his eyes, he was met with a familiar white ceiling he knew too well...he was in the 4th Division, wasn't he..? Next, he saw Hisagi-san, who was by his side in seconds. He felt slightly better already and he knew for sure he was going to live.

Thank...goodness...

"Kira..." Shuuhei let out a relieved sigh, "How are you...feeling?"

His body hurt all over, but... Izuru was glad. He was glad to see his friend's kind eyes again...and he smiled, "I'm...better..." his voice was hoarse and sounded bad, but it was better than not being able to talk at all.

"...why were you there, Kira? You should have gotten out when you still could, you should-"

"Hai...ku..."

Shuuhei's concerned babble stopped in an instant as he heard Izuru, "A...Haiku?"

Kira nodded.

The brunet sat there in thought for a second, but then his eyed widened, as if remembering something, before narrowing into miserable ones, "I'm...sorry..." he had Kazeshini's memories.

Kira shook his head a bit, holding out his hand again just like last time, which the tattooed man grasped, "An inner battle fought...A subject of hope...On the sunny day," Kira managed out slowly, Shuuhei's eyes widening.

Of course, that was not what the original Haiku held, but...it no longer mattered. The new one had a far greater, deeper meaning. Of his entire day's experience... As well as Hisagi-san's.

And Shuuhei leaned over, kissing Izuru on the lips.

_Heavy thoughts_

_Inner turmoil_

_Love is born._

_**The End.**_


End file.
